i really felt alone recently, but i don't know why will i felt like this...
college life started, don't this a good starting? i don't think so..
Our distance become further and further after i start my college life...perhaps both of us are quite busy for job and study... yet, why i felt alone is better for me? Independent ady be my serious routine.. i can't change it.. everything you can do i also can do it... in this case, what the purpose for me to be with you? am i need to hurt myself like that.. not really! i always feel afraid when i be with you... only you din realise what i'm really feel... perhaps you always caring me but i din realise..why all people ask me to left you alone? why they always said i can get 1 more who is much better than what you have? i always feel confuse with this kind of Question... do i need to trust them? althought my family also said this... i know that all the conclusion will decide by myself.. but my decision totally will influence by others judgment...why i always heard something bad from others regarding your problem? don't you do better and better? i've given lots of ways to you for your job, why you still change nothing? i felt helpless.. i don't know what to do... u can make me blur blur.... sometimes i discover something wrong with us... i'm not decide to said that due to protect my study mood and your working mood..i'm not dare to think what will we be in the future, since our opinion are totally different with each other.. i really don't know how to communicate with you part of the time...am i need to be patience and patience? or i just need to talk out everthing keep in my heart? i know that you treat me good.. i'm not the only person you treat good... there is another person around us... that's my feel... sometimes can be ignore, sometimes is reality...it's going to 1 year after 4 month... last year December 2009 i change my life, do i need to change again for this year December 2010? i hope not to change it again.. Let it keep on better and better.. 7 days more will be one year for yours left each other.. is it possible for yours to recover again....i don't know and also not dare to think about it.. everything is yours decision not mine... i'm the person only can follow yours decision yet not decide for yours...Pls don't hurt me eventhough both of you wanna recover... Pls tell me honestly... i'll accept it... Joyce & Janice... you must keep on your life.. don't let other people make noice in your life...you need to keep silent if possible, you are able to do it, just see whether you want to do or not... Althought you have leave me... but i still miss the period be with you... hope you get a better life in other country than M'sia..
