Unstoptable tears coming out unintentionally

Again... This sad and hurt feeling come again to me... Listening music now... But i cant even stop my mind to think on the person who hurt me in such a deep way... I know i am so stupid to think on this person.. But what can i do except working and study fulfill my time... i just want myself to feel busy like hell... Only then i can stop myself thinking on you... Even though now you are not around... But i am so dangerous to thinking of u sometimes... When pplsuddently remind my memory... I will die with hard... I need to endure my deep feeling in front of other and forcemyself smile like an stupid person... I am also dun wan ppl to worry me... But pls tell me wat can i do for this. . I hope i really can think on how to forget u in my life... I noe is not easy... But somehow i wanna try no matter how hard... I want life going on wothout influences by u... Bt... Tell me... How should i do on it... I just release it by my tears and nothing else can do on it... Sometimes i did ask myself... What am i cry for? I noe is worthless... But. ... Not that i cant let go... Wat i can say is... Walk the talk is hard for me in terms of this... I did try b4... Am i successful... I really dunno... It is not everything i can verbally disclose to others... I really cannot endure my tears rolling in my eyes when talking to other... I dun ean to cry infront of ppl... Is it too hard for me to do sa... Not that i dun wan to say... I hv no confident at all.... Crying day again... Hope can slp well after cry... Good night

不知不觉。。又是三月了

最近到底都在忙些什么? 精神感觉上越来越差。。工作, 学业, 交友圈子都给我一种怪怪的感觉。。懒惰开电脑的我就是喜欢在这里胡言乱语。。哈哈。。 See... again... midnight already when the time i try to update my blog... is it too late for me to stay a bit late to finished this blog to follow up my everyday's mood to be recall in the future~~ It's Ok.. give myself a target to update this blog until the end of my song.... this is just the 1st beautiful song in my album... let it continue without stopping... haha Today as usual... morning... went to coursemate house to do assignment since 930am until 10pm... is really tired like hell and got to continue my work in house merely because the presentation slide have not been finished. Yesterday was the 1st exercise with yi wen, Thai, and kt ... it's such a fun activity even though i really tired yet enjoy.. It's March coming... which means my exam is getting near... my trip also getting near liao... hahaha... can fully enjoy after my exam.. Paul relationship is over... the hurt thing in today morning was the talked from my father... he think that i am playing with relationship... he dunno everything and straight 判我死刑..damn hurt and sad until i can even drop my tears out while driving... forsure... i still aware of the road... just that... i can't imagine that... end of the story... is still my fault, i felt somehow so tired to explain to them as they totally dunno my feeling... Sometimes i really wondering why my fren will even more care and understand my feeling... really confuse myself..and suddenly emo again... make my mind blank until afternoon came back from home tuition. Sometimes just simply expect family member can just care me silently... because i m crazy handle work and study... have no time to entertain trouble create from family... really ... i will surrender one day... pls forgive me.. Recently feel is quite weird until i cant even explain by myself what am i thinking of.... but the only thing i can say is... stay single is the best for me now.. no matter how hard... Janice! pls stay strong... i know i can do it.. confident is all from urself.. no one can help u except encouraging u unstopped.. Still got 3 more song to go... let's continue the blog as well... Semester 2 is going to end... which means semester 3 is going to start... soon... going to graduate... uk life... dunno how...a question for myself is... am i able to handle the work for next semester? i asked myself everyday b4 slp... haiz... still thinking Look at the moon on my left hand site, is clear in light but blur in my eyes... maybe is time for me to slp... but is not easy to get back this blogspot account ... therefore, i think i should fully utilised my time and energy to appreciate those who really put effort to help me to get back my memory. Thank you to my bro ^^ Anyway, this article is going to longer than my report today... no matter how... i hope life can stay happy for myself also those who around me.. Rick yong is learning from me in explore our potential as i told him.. we are not that limited and weak in terms of energy... why are we just get used to the lazy environment yet actually we can do better and even more than we suppose to do... life is just short... we cant wait for chance but seek for chance... chances are always reserve for those who are ready... whether u believe o not... it's highly up to u...okok... is time to slp liao... Regard